Our friend Michael from the great state of Indiana visited us
here in California recently. While discussing world affairs over breakfast
coffee he informed us that many Hoosiers (who after all elected the ultra conservative
and now Vice President Mike Pence as their state’s governor) view California as
some sort of strange planet where heaven knows what goes on—a truly foreign
republic right out of Star Wars.
I must confess in some ways I can’t fault the more conservative
Hoosiers. Let’s face it, and I say this as a native of The Golden State,
California can be a bit out there. Just take a look at our recently released
voter guide for the upcoming California primary election.
We have 27 candidates for governor. I am not kidding. There are
the usual candidates, including the current lieutenant governor, the state
treasurer, a state assemblyman, a self-described taxpayer advocate who is not
surprisingly a Republican, and a self-described public policy advisor, which is
California election talk for a Democratic politician who has been termed out
from his previous spot. But that is just the beginning of our out there
election fun.
Also among the gubernatorial candidates is a puppeteer, a
virtual reality manager and a marketplace minister. I do know what a puppeteer
does but must confess the other occupations are a bit of a mystery to me.
Moving down the ballot, the race for lieutenant governor is
boring by comparison, with the candidates list including an attorney,
economist, entrepreneur and retired business owner. And the race for Secretary
of State gets even more boring as the incumbent is widely considered a shoe-in.
He has not been challenged by a virtual reality manager.
Next we have the race for California Senator, which is where the
best fun is found. Here we have 32 candidates, including long time incumbent
Sen. Dianne Feinstein. To win she is going to have to beat a paratransit
operator, a bus driver, a constitutional solutions advocate, a wireless safety
advocate and 27 other Californians. Having worked in public transit I have the
highest respect for paratransit operators and bus drivers. And do you know
anyone who is not a wireless safety advocate? I’m not quite sure about what the
job description of a constitutional solutions advocate includes but confess it
sounds intriguing.
In our California Official Voter Information Guide, each
candidate for statewide office has the opportunity to submit a statement of
qualifications, so with this great number of candidates you can appreciate why
the guide has the heft of an old-fashioned phone book. The statements of
previously elected officials are run of the mill, although this time I didn’t
spot anyone referencing motherhood and apple pie. But the statements of what
might be called fringe candidates make for great reading. One candidate for
U.S. Senator is running on a platform of nullifying the 2016 presidential
election. I’m not even going to go there. Another wants to get the government
out of our wallets, although he doesn’t specify how he would propose to pay for
police, fire and all that.
But far and away the best statements of qualifications come from
the candidates for governor. One candidate’s platform consists primarily of
teaching your children calculus. Who could argue with that unless your child is
an artist. And my personal favorite is from a candidate whose platform consists
of two words, “Why not!” I honestly can’t say why not. Maybe he’s on to
something.
Yes, California can be a bit strange, yet we are once again the
world’s 5th largest economy that provides you with so many goodies like Google,
Apple, Hollywood, and all that Walmart stuff that comes through our ports. So
come on, Indiana, what’s not to like? Like you we are just one of the 50 states
doing our best, even if a bit weirdly from time to time. And by the way, I’ve
been to Indiana and like it!
1 comment:
Well said!
Post a Comment